Taking a Step Back

She sat by the door in her bedroom, “Indian style” with the green shag carpet grazing each of her calves.  The full length mirror on the back of the door served as a periscope into her teenage soul.

“Who are you, REALLY?” she would ask as she gazed deep and long into her own brown eyes.
“Where did you come from and where are you going…?”

The sharp knock on the other side of the door sliced through her thoughts like a knife and her Mother’s voice carried through the thin wood, “Dinner’s ready, honey”.

“Okay Mom.”

She got up and opened the door as the smell of her mother’s beef Stroganoff wafted down the hallway.

But she stepped back into the room and took one more look at her young face and said, “We’ll continue this conversation later…”

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She is of course, me.

I’ve been looking in the mirror a lot lately, not so much actually staring at my own face but instead “reflecting” on this life and the blessings I have and how somehow I have been taking them for granted lately.

This is NOT who I want to be.

I’m going to step away a bit from this space (and all social media as well).  Not because I necessarily want to but because I HAVE to.  ALL THE THINGS are overwhelming me and something has got to give.

My kids are in a stage where they NEED me a lot (I mean Hello! they are 8, 5 and almost 3! Duh). And although my husband is a very busy man, he also NEEDS me to pay attention to him when he is here.  I am needed and that is a good thing.

So… I’ll be around some while the kids are at school or if Tim is working late but my posts probably will not be as frequent or up at the same time every night.

I’ve come to the realization in the last week or two that I just cannot do it ALL.  I can do most of it.  And I can do some of it well.  But I cannot do it ALL WELL all at the same time and that is showing.  I am after all, only human. And of course, my family is THE most important thing.

So, I’ll see ya when I see ya.

xo

p.s. putting Miss Elaine-ous Monday oh a hiatus for a while… I may still do it occasionally here or there but not every week.  And well, I may not… 

p.p.s. you can probably find me most on Instagram these days, follow me, I’m MISSELAINE0375.