The other day I walked into the dance studio to deliver K to her class and on the long bench before me sat several mothers I did not recognize. But then I DID recognize them.
They were mothers of little ones. You know, new-ish moms with kids younger than school age. Each one sat with a baby or toddler bouncing on their knee. There were four of them all in a row. I overheard talk of vaccines and diapers and car seats and when to give up the “noonie” (what they call a pacifier around here).
Meanwhile, there I sat with my boys, each having their screen time while my “baby” was in the other room sporting her tap shoes. I had never seen these ladies before because they were the regulars for the morning class and they combined with K’s afternoon class that day. I was particularly interested in how beautifully put together they all were. I’m not sure I was ever that coiffed as a mother of little ones. And there they sat, all in a row, perfectly perfect with their cherubs so happy, not a cry did I hear.
How did they do it?
I thought of my days like that, taking B to something with little ones in tow, like VBS or soccer. How K sat on a blanket with her chubby legs, pulling at the dandelions around here while her older brother kicked the black and white ball around.
Today we went to the zoo with some friends and I was so happy to have my kids at the ages they are now. No stroller or diaper bag did I need. I simply sported a comfy backpack with the essentials, including our lunches and my handy little camera. Anyone who needed to go potty while we were there went on their own. Diapers are a thing of the past. I never had to pick anyone up and put them on my hip. They gladly boarded the train all on their own…
The cute moms in the dance studio made me a bit whimsical the other day. They definitely had my attention right away and I smiled at them as I passed. I thought of everything that I did a while ago that they are currently doing now. I thought about how some of them are probably still waking up in the middle of the night and how one may have had to deal with a diaper blow out earlier that day (although probably not, they all seemed so damn perfect, I’m sure even their babies’ poo don’t stink…)
But I’m also pretty glad I am no longer them – that a trip to the zoo is a breeze compared to what it used to be.
And that tonight my kids are having a “slumber party” in the boys’ room and K will end up on the top or bottom bunk, who really knows. Later, I will check on them all and someone will be snuggled into the other as they lightly snore. I will smile as I close the bedroom door and think about how today we had some fun with very little use of baby wipes (yes, I still carry those around, I may have older kids but I’m not stupid…).
Apparently he’s a member of the Staff…
Can you spot the tween in this photo? Bet you can! 😉
I like your approach Mr. Llama. Wish I could break the lock too…
Yes, that is your good side, Sir. You’re welcome.
“It tickles!!”
“It licked me!!”
“Choo Choo!”
Cheesin’ on the zoo train
synchronized grazing
Tamara says
ha! I bet their poo DOES stink.
I think I”m kinda in between this. I have a near five-year-old and I have a near two-year-old, definitely still in diapers.
When I joined my birth group with Scarlet, there were people there who were on their second or third children. They told me later that it was hard to bond with all of us first-timers, yet many did.
When I went to my birth group with Des, it was just..all different. I couldn’t relate to their fears of TV and constipation and nursing galore. I just knew..at this point…that everything is temporary and that most of us survive this!
Also, I couldn’t go to all of the baby events with a four-year-old in tow.
It was quite a perspective I was not prepared for.
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Elaine says
Your mindset just changes so much after you’ve DONE IT, versus anticipating doing it all, you know? And especially after having more than one!
Tonya says
Being an older mom the second time around and having an almost 5 year old in school, I’m meeting a lot of moms younger than me that are doing this for the first time. It only makes me feel older, but somehow also wiser. If that makes any sense.
Looks like a fun day at the zoo!
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Elaine says
Yes, I get that. But I like being wiser, don’t you? 😉
It was fun! thanks!
Katie-LovesofLife says
I liked this post 🙂 I think it’s awesome to hear that you don’t really look back with sadness/miss it too much. I feel like everyone makes it seem like WAHHH you’re gonna be SOOOO SAD ALL THE TIME and I just keep thinking, wow-sounds kinda…nice. HA. I’m awful. But even as Lucy gets older (nearing 2) I feel a different sense of freedom. Just, you know, not newborn, not baby…getting more kid’ish. I can only imagine how that will keep going as they get older and I’m not wishing this time away, but kinda look forward to that too 🙂
Elaine says
First, LUCY IS ALMOST 2? Nuts. Also, thanks! I would be lying if I said I did not miss some things about the baby stage but outings like the zoo? NOT something I miss about the baby stage. LOL!
Lisa @ The Golden Spoons says
I agree! I like my girls the ages they are now – 11, 9, & 6. Every stage has its good and its bad, but where we are now feels pretty great. I do not miss those crazy baby days!
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Elaine says
I think those are awesome ages!! I kinda can’t wait…
Julia says
It is nice to be at a place where you don’t need all that stuff. We are almost there. And I remember as a new mom that I would do my best to look good on the outside to cover up how tired, exhausted and overwhelmed I was.
Elaine says
These ladies looked like they were none of those things at all, Julia. They probably have nannies… 😉
sarah reinhart says
I feel like I’m caught in between. I’ve got some big kids, some littles, and I’m about to start over…..Ah! Oh, and I hear you on the baby wipes. They are so multi-purpose. I’ll probably carry them with me for years and years still. xx.
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Elaine says
Sarah, you remind me of my cousin with 7 kiddos. 🙂 She’s got ALL THE STAGES going on at once! ha!
Kerstin @ Auer Life says
Noonie? Of course I totally read “nooner”. Sigh. LOL 🙂
Anyway – yes to zoo visits without diapers! Does the zoo have wifi 😉 ?
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Elaine says
Ha ha! Yes, my ears had to figure out what exactly they were hearing when we moved here, Kerstin… 😉
Kimberly says
I was forced to join a group because it was supposed to be “therapy” to surround myself with other moms…who were picture perfect.
My OB said that they are full of shit. Think about it. No mom has it easy. I don’t understand why we fool others. If I ever (never) have another I will more than likely be the older one. I did find that the older ones were such a breath of fresh air. They were seasoned and had more advice for us.
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Elaine says
I think new moms should hang out with more not-so-new moms. There is MUCH to learn there. Picture perfect has never worked for me either. xo
Alison says
Oh dude. I’m still in the trenches 🙂
K looks so big!
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Elaine says
I know she does! ack!
And yes, trenches. But that’s okay. You’ll be out before you know it, right? 😉
Kim@Co-Pilot Mom says
My youngest is about to turn 5. I can’t believe it. Shouldn’t he still be little?
But when we go somewhere and it doesn’t take me an hour to pack up and put the stroller in the car and make sure we have all the food and drinks we will need, yes. I think about how far we have come. It is easier in so many ways now that we are past the early stage.
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Elaine says
5 is gonna throw me for a loop in October too, Kim. I hear ya! But yes, there are advantages to them getting older. So I will take solace in that! 😉
Roxanne says
I get the same thoughts when I see women with babies or toddlers, and then I look at my 7-year-old and I’m so glad we’re past the diaper-changing, hold-me-every-second, momma-don’t-sleep stage.
And then I think…maybe I could do it one more time…?
I love these pictures.
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