It was morning and I stood at the kitchen sink doing some dishes.
Behind me I heard noises. Of the child kind. Lots of them.
The toddler was babbling about something while playing with her scrambled eggs. The pre-schooler was talking about what he was going to draw and wielding a crayon. Again.
I blocked them out a bit and looked somewhat longingly out the window over the sink and into my neighbor’s car port where her vehicle was still parked, her husband’s already gone.
Our neighbors to the right are grandparents and their only daughter and grandchild live on the East coast. They are so sweet to us and our children and we are lucky to have them as friends and neighbors.
I couldn’t help but stand there and envy her, not having to get up because her child had to eat breakfast or get off to school or have a diaper changed. I wondered if she was still in her robe, enjoying her coffee while reading a book as she sunk into her cushy reading chair, her feet resting comfortably on an ottoman.
Maybe she had a relaxing day of yoga and a nice long uninterrupted shower (bliss!) and coffee with a friend and more reading planned. I smiled to myself as I thought if it all.
But then I thought, what if as she looks into my garage and sees me buckling kids in for the fourth time that day and hears their laughs and notices their sweet faces and sort of envies me?
What if she thinks about my day of feeding kids and taking them for a walk in the wagon and to a play date and home from school and kinda wishes for those days back?
Does she see us and long for the days when her daughter was little? Does she wish that she could hit rewind and do some things differently or over again? Maybe she even wishes she’d had more than one child. Perhaps she wonders how life moved so, so fast…
I try to remember these things when I get caught up in the crazy, busy days that are my life right now. When Little G is whining incessantly and The B Man is giving me attitude and Baby K is hollering for something that I cannot discern. When the laundry is piled up and there are more dishes to do, I try to remind myself this will NOT last forever and that maybe, just maybe, a long day by myself is somewhere over the horizon.
But then, will I even want that someday? Sure, maybe for a while but then I can imagine it getting pretty lonely as well.
And often times we simply want what we cannot/do not have. Curly hair instead of straight. Flat butt instead of curvy one. Alone time instead of someone constantly needing us. It’s human nature I think, to want what we don’t have because we don’t KNOW. I have no idea what it would be like to be so tall that it would be hard to find pants at the store but that doesn’t mean I don’t long for longer legs. 🙂
And right now I have NO idea what it would be like to have days to myself. But it doesn’t mean that there aren’t times that I daydream about finding out…
thoughts to ponder, hum… dont wish these days away for they will be gone soon enough. I’m finding this out now with my 20 year old. thank God I was blessed with my little guy or I would be lost right now!! btw, your kids are adorable!!
It’s too funny I am reading your post today as I had a very similar experience this afternoon. For years when I was doing the daily carpool to school and home I would feel like this was all my day was about (taxi Mom) and complain. Well it’s now been almost two years since my husband took over this role and due to illness I stepped in today. Wow here I was thinking I was scoring by not having to do this anymore, not, I realized today just how many special spontaneous moments I am missing, made me a little sad. However as you said I am sure if I took over this again within the month I would be complaining 😉
I love the new look. I am looking for a designer to redo my blog!!!!!
Ugh. I know. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately too. Trying to remind myself of this very thing. But I have been so grouchy lately. I am so easily annoyed. I am blaming it on winter and it being January. January is such a hard month for me. It seems to long. And so cold. And just, ugh. At least I hope that’s it. Maybe I just need an attitude adjustment.
Great post!
I love the new look!
my girls aren’t even grown yet and I still look back and wish I could savor more and do more and then I snap back to today and realize that need to embrace today because there will never be another day like it. (not that you need to, but sometimes I get get all down looking back and get caught up with the what-ifs)
p.s. LOVE the new design!
Oh girl, you know I feel what you are saying. I’ve been struggling with some resentment issues at home lately. So I’m trying (heavy on the trying part) to say a prayer of gratitude when I start to feel that way. And miracle of miracles, I think it is helping! And I think being honest about how you feel helps too. We can acknowledge the good that we have and admit to a longing for something else too, when we keep perspective, which you are obviously doing.
Oh I love this post. I can so totally relate.
I too have to remind myself, that is busy craziness is not forever and someday, I will miss it.
I love this so much because it is so true. Like that song, “You’re gonna miss this…” I think that is true. We long for what we don’t have instead of focusing on the blessings we do. And I totally think it is human nature.
You are so right. Gotta enjoy these moments while we have them!
So very true. I think we will always have moments of jealousy when we want what other have or what we previously had, but then, we sit back and realize that for the most part, we have it pretty dang good.
This one goes in the “best of” file, my friend! Wow, what a powerful and timely post! You’re so right, we always want what we don’t/can’t have…but as soone as we get it, we want to wish it away again. sigh.
loved reading this..so true. It panics me to think of Tim and I alone in the house…I try to remember this when the kids overwhelm us..one day they will have their own lives…and that day is coming sooner then we all would like.
Wish I could wrap up childhood and revisit it anytime I want…
What a beautiful post! It is so true that the grass isn’t so green on the other side. I am sure that your neighbor does often enjoy you and your young children. Time goes way to fast and I’m with you…we need to cherish the moments cause they will be gone in the blink of an eye and I have a feeling these are the days we will be pining for!