Sometimes as as mothers we have no idea what our day holds.
Perhaps you’ve carefully planned a day of running at the gym in the morning, nap time for the toddler, Uno time with the 7 year old, reading blogs, hanging out on tweetdeck all while the pre-schooler is at summer “school”. But somewhere in there you hadn’t showered yet when the phone rings and the assistant director at the school says on the other end, “G says he put a rock up his nose. Maybe you should come get him.”
Good thing you (meaning ME) had already had lunch.
My response?
“Is he crying, is he in pain, have you felt around to see if there really is something in there?”
Hers:
“Yes M’am, we can’t see or feel anything but we just thought you might want to have him checked out.”
Mine:
“Okay, I’ll be there in a bit to get him.”
(meanwhile my internal monologue is all WTH?!?)
So, all the rest of the day’s plans are out the window as you (meaning me) RUN to go take a shower, call the neighbor (thank GOD she’s home!) to come stay with the sleeping toddler and come to find him at school happily eating a popsicle and questioning the whole thing.
After lots of tweeting with my tweeps, texting with the hubs, a call to the pediatrician and asking G over and OVER whether there really IS a rock in his nose, you (meaning me) decide to load up the kids and take him to the local clinic.
And guess what!?!?! They do not have proper tools to extract things inserted into little noses by little boy fingers (same story at the pediatrician, btw…) so they advise you (after all of them telling their own “oh yes, so-and-so totally put a button/peanut/m&m up his/her nose stories…) to go to the ER.
THE ER!!!!
(I hate the ER)
Thankfully your hubs offers to take him and so after you (meaning me) take the kids for burgers you meet him at the house and he takes him.
And when they come back less than an hour later and you ask “SO!?!?!? Was there really a rock in there?!?!” and your hubs says “mmmm…. not sure…” you’re a tad puzzled (that’s a really nice way of saying “using expletives in your head”) as to how no one saw said rock.
He tells you (meaning me) how he thinks he maybe saw some small thing come out of his nose. He says possibly getting said thing out of his nose was NOT an easy or at all fun task to watch and then you are upset that your baby had to go through that.
When you ask toddler he says that the rock is gone, takes a bath, enjoys his ER sticker prizes and goes to bed fine.
And you (meaning ME!) are kinda wishing you could drive back to ER and scour the floor for tiny pebbles that may look like something that was in your son’s nose.
I mean it’s not like I have any plans tonight…
P.S. I’m sharing my awesome with Momma Made It Look Easy and you can too
Dude, you have to bronze it. Get going…
On second thought, I love you and imagine your tetanus shot is not up to date, stay OFF the ER floor.
PS: true story – the father of hub’s best friend since childhood was a pediatric surgeon. He kept a huge jar in his office, I’m talking like that pretzel barrel thing you get from Costco, FULL of stuff that he had to surgically remove from kiddos. A rock up the nose is tame. Try eating an Army dude.
Not that you kids would.
XO
I would be dying to know if there were really a rock up there!
My daughter put a bead up her nose. What IS the fascination with that stuff?
I would have to know if there was something up there!
My 2 year old put a raisin up his nose a few weeks ago. I don’t understand their fascination with this!
Ugh. So, so frustrating.
Also? Boys are icky.
XO
Unlike the adventures in babysitting, the adventures in parenting never end.
I once tried to put a little Lego up my nose. You know, one of the little single pieces. I was so terrified once it was in there that I’d never be able to get it out. I was flat-out panicking. I blew – HARD – and it came out. What a relief. I never told anyone and I definitely never tried that again.
Elaine,
Sorry you had to go through all that! (When I was little, my sister put tick-tacks in her nose, and my brother had a wasp crawl in his nose… no fun!)
I love your new design. So pretty!
Hugs,
Genny
As a nurse I have threatened my children regularly with the phrase, “I am NOT taking you to the ER and telling them that you . . .” (insert whatever stupid thing they are currently considering doing). Unfortunately, they are 19 and 12 and I still have to use this threat fairly regularly. sigh.
Baby Girl stuck styrofoam up her nose when she was a toddler. While I was driving down 1-10. Through downtown Houston. That was fun.
Why do kids do that? “I think I’ll stick this ??? up my nose.” {deep sigh} Kids.
That’s hilarious!!! (totally in a glad it’s you and not me kinda way
i have a thing-up-the -nose story, but I’ll spare you. 
thanks for sharing!! Glad to know I’m not alone in the not sure if my kid is lying or not camp!
See your life was just too calm after BlogHer. It is always something isn’t it. That is the kind of thing that drives me nuts because there is absolutely nothing you can do but follow the path that leads you to the ER.
Um, I can make you feel so much better.
Dan had a patient come into the ER with a CORDLESS PHONE UP HIS A$$.
So really? A rock isn’t all that bad.
Never a dull moment as a mom, huh?
Never, ever a dull moment! I hate going to the ER, hate it with a passion. Won’t go unless completely necessary! Which of course would be to determine if a rock was or was not up his nose. I’d be completely frustrated not to have a firm answer!
Kids are so much fun, aren’t they?
ACK!
Rocks in the nose??
Why didn’t they have to ability to get it out at the clinic?
Do they not have a lot of children in with items in their noses?
You would think so wouldn’t you?
Oh, I sooo would want to go and search for that rock, too!
I did read this when you posted it. I have no idea why I didn’t comment then. Probably had something to do with my four little crazies.
Anyway…
Yes. As you know, I totally relate. Crazy kids.
All’s well that ends well, right?