I Couldn’t See…

We’ve been walking around the neighborhood almost every night with the kids in the last few weeks. Most of the time The B Man rides his too little for him “Thomas” bike while the baby and Little G go in the wagon. Some nights B doesn’t want to ride so in that case he and G go in the bike trailer, which also functions as a ‘stroller’, and baby goes in the regular stroller.

Tonight Tim was late getting home from work so I took the kids by myself, which meant that B HAD to ride his bike and I had to pull the two littles in the wagon. Oh yeah, that’s yet ANOTHER way they ride (not comfortable with G and K riding together next to each other in bike trailer yet…).

So anywho… Obviously B can go faster on his bike than I can walking and pulling close to 50 pounds in the wagon (G is weighing in at 31.8 and K at almost 17). He has a tendency to get TOO far ahead and tonight it was WAY too far. I could barely see him and we were coming up to the end of the residential street that then goes out onto a VERY busy street where the speed limit is 45mph and well frankly, it scares the ever lovin’ c.r.a.p outta me.

Now before I go any further with this story, know that we have a little “routine” on these walks. The sidewalk he rides on does “dead end” before the busy street and B knows to stop there and turn around.

However. Tonight there was a family out in their yard and the mother could see B better than I could (I was a good 400-500 ft behind him) and she started running after him but he kept going. I panicked because I thought maybe something had happened where he couldn’t control his bike and since she had a better view than me I just wasn’t sure what was going on. I dropped the wagon handle (on the right-hand sidewalk, other kids were fine) and started running and yelling his name. And he STILL kept going.

In that moment. THAT moment, I truly felt THE MOST helpless that I’ve EVER felt as a parent. If he were headed to that busy street, I couldn’t get there in time to stop him. I don’t think the other woman could have either. And not only helpless but THE most petrified too.

And then? He stopped, right at the end of the sidewalk, like he ALWAYS does.

She didn’t know our routine.

I couldn’t see.

It was scary.

Once it was all over we both cried (him more so than me). He thought he was “in trouble” but I tried my best to explain that the other lady didn’t know and I couldn’t see. I wanted him to know that he did nothing wrong except just go too far ahead.

He’ll be staying closer to me now.

How will I ever be able to let him leave home?

I have no idea…