I am pissed at Facebook. Because I think it is very responsible for people not reading my blogs anymore very much. I mean, think about it – back before Facebook really became a “thing” we had more time to read longer, better things. We were watching fewer videos and getting less huffy about “vaguebooking”. We had longer attentions spans. I blame FB for ruining our attention spans and kind of want to sue them for more adults having ADD. I do have an attorney now so… hmm…
Listen, we only have so many hours in the day. Now we spend them on Facebook, Instagram (guilty) and Snapchat (not guilty). For those of us who like to talk about ourselves (clearly I am in that club), it’s extra hard to keep people’s attention these days. So Facebook has become like that “guy” that we HAVE to hang out with but don’t really like. But, since he’s pretty popular and attractive, we end up wanting to spend time around him. We don’t WANT to like him, but we do. And so do all the other girls. He’s like a “bad boy”, with cigarettes and a flask full of liquor.
Plus, all these OTHER people want to be around him too, so then everyone is begging for his attention and his middle name is Algorithm, which has a shitty ring to it.
Sorry, Facebook Algorithm, but I kind of wish we were not “friends”. Unfortunately, you are pretty enticing. Even when you decide to make big personality changes and mess with our privacy settings, we still go along with what you have to say and follow you wherever you go.
I would say that I am going to “lose your number” and not contact you again but then I would have to lose a bunch of friends’ numbers too and we would not be able to talk as often. How in the world did you finagle this, you smart S.O.B.? And I could TOTALLY break up with you but if I ever wanted to contact you again then I would get sucked back into your crazy world full of bunnies-sleeping-in-wine-glasses videos and political conversations that debate the real color of Trump’s hair.
Then there are the groups cliques I find myself in. I wasn’t “cliquey” in high school so how did you make me this way as an adult? You’re a jerk. (Although I like a couple of my cliques groups a whole lot, but still…)
Also, those “memory” things that come up that you love to remind me about?? Yeah, some of them aren’t so fun anymore. And I know I can turn them off, except the ones of my babies are super cute. However, you also like to bring up things in the past that I don’t care to see again and that’s just rude. Since you’re a “social” platform, you kinda need to get a clue about that kind of stuff.
Also, have you ever heard the term “time suck”? ‘Cause you’re totally one of those. You’re probably proud of it though (more advertising money and all).
And speaking of advertising. How do you do that thing where you know that I was JUST shopping for shoes on Zappos or a lamp on Joss & Main? You’re a creepy stalker, that’s what you are.
So, as you can tell, Facebook Algorithm Timesuck is not really my boyfriend. I would like to “break up” with him but I can’t (he even provides some of my income in a round about way). Damn, this relationship is so confusing. Can’t you tell?
Uhhhhhggggg.
Agree!! I think about how much more I could get done in a day if I didn’t feel the need to check FB constantly.. I have often daydreamed about cancelling my account, but I have too many friends and family that I don’t live near and wouldn’t be able to keep up with them.
Yes! Yes! Yes! You nailed it! Stupid Facebook is sucking the life out of us all! We only read and think in snippets and the best people do now is copy and paste someone else’s thoughts!
If you take a hiatus, you feel like everyone went to the party but you. You’re afraid of what you’ll miss, so you keep coming back like a bad train wreck.
I’m going with the whole social experiment theory. That either proves them right or us stupid. Or those are the same.
Ugggg!
Debbie recently posted…A Collection of Things
I hate the word “algorithm”.
Alison recently posted…How to Love and Embrace Your Postpartum Body
I agree! I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. Although I do have to say that when I claim my time as my own and screw what everyone else on social media is doing according to what FB says we “should” be doing… I’m happier with life. I get things done. I connect more often. WE have the power and the freedom to get back to reading more blogs and looking at less videos. It’s easier said than done, but when I do that, I feel just like I did way back in 2012. And that was loving Facebook all the time.
Andrea recently posted…Burning Down the House
I LOVE it.
I don’t have any readers any more so basically Facebook is my thing. It accompanies me to many doctors appointments and makes me feel better about my life…yup, I keep them train wrecks from high school. Also Instagram. I dig it. I don’t pay attention to algorithms…much like SEO…probably why my blogs gone to hell…Meh…life is short…You’ll drive yourself batty.
I FEEL your pain. Facebook used to be my friend too, how he hates me and I kinda hate him too! What a blogger to do?! Love this post lady!
The husband and I were just talking about Facebook today. I hate it because it’s always finding ways to decrease reach (0 people seeing a post…really?), the Husband hates it because it won’t show him posts from pages he wants to see. If only breaking up were a viable option.
Leslie recently posted…The Downside to Over-the-Top Kids Parties
Yep. I definitely have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. I think it is mostly hate these days, but it is an election year so that has something to do with it.
Honestly, I think I am having a major problem with social media in general. Not blogging. That is personal and heartfelt. But comments sections, and Facebook, and the like. Everyone wanting to express their outrage over everything everyone else is doing. Everyone thinking their opinion is gold. So much negativity. Ugh. I can’t take it. I think I may be hiding out in my blog more again.
Kat recently posted…Full Circle