Did Y’all Know That I am “Frumpy”?

Yeah, me neither.

Turns out some stranger on the Huffington Post FB page thinks I am. I’m also supposedly a bad selfie-taker and because I do not like to impulse buy lipstick and shoes (okay the second one is kind of a lie…), I am “lame”. People also inferred that I like to sit around in yoga pants all the time and that I no longer like to go to concerts. I never said anything about either of those things. And yes, I DO like to eat cookie dough ice cream (at a certain time each month, Ahem) so I must be the worst, most boring MOM ever who loves to inhale junk food ALLTHETIME.

And yes, the fact that I have children got a WHOLE bunch of people riled up. Did you know that apparently a TON of women who are 40 or older OR younger GREATLY dislike the idea that women are mothers???

Yeah, I didn’t know that either until I was featured on the H.P. with my things I’ve learned by 40 list.

And yes, they (HuffPo) changed the title from my original post and a few other things. But some people are REALLY pissed they did not include the word “mom” in the title. I was called a “breeder” and my question to those would simply be, “Was YOUR mom a breeder?” I also find it interesting that since they changed the title everyone on HuffPo missed out on the best part about the GAP making crappy shoes. So instead of the comments being about that these readers were much more concerned with what time of day to take off your bra, or whether to even wear one or not.

That’s me and my not-so-great-selfie on the Huffington Post FB page...

So yeah, turns out the post was more well-suited for my personal blog here, which by the way is the place where it got friendly, positive feedback (and garnered the MOST HITS I HAVE EVER HAD ON THIS BLOG EVER). And in my own FB circles. Go figure.

I posted a few things I learned about being featured on the H.P. the other day, on my FB wall.

But one thing I did not know at the time was that I could also be insulted in Spanish. Because, yes, the article was also featured at El Huffington Post. Where someone that read it there (and tweeted) compared me to Bridget Jones. In a bad way. I kinda like that comparison though. Pretty bueno if you ask me. 😉

It’s just SO interesting to me how literally HUNDREDS of people who know NOTHING about me, and have only read that one little article I wrote, decided to say rude and insulting things about me both in the comments on the site and on the H.P. FB page.

A few people stood up for me and stated the obvious. You know, that I cannot write what I have learned from the perspective of a non-mom because well, I’m not a non-mom (stay with me here). Others stated the obvious, that my list is just ONE person’s perspective and that perhaps all these others (haters) could just respect that. I am also going to count 38K likes (and counting) and thousands of FB shares a win…

It’s just saddening to me that so many people have to be unkind and judgmental. Right out of the gate. Like I am the horse who never had a chance to win the race. Very few people picked up on some of the positive things on the list – I had to go back and read and make sure they kept those things in there. They did, by the way.

So, yes, I was thrilled to be featured there but I am also a little jaded now. I’ve never had “trolls” on my own blog. I suppose if people have not liked what I have to say they have mostly kept it to themselves. And I get that the H.P. has a MUCHO (see what I did there?) broader audience than this little space here, but STILL. Can’t we just be a little nicer?

I know something similar (on an even broader scope) happened to my friend Galit. Of course, as is her way, she made sweet, kind lemonade out of lemons and now has a book that is indeed needed in this new world we are pioneering. Kindness Wins is a mantra that many HuffPo readers might want to start adopting. It is also the name of Galit’s new book that I will be reading very soon. And yes, I am promoting it before reading because I KNOW the writer and if anyone could be an authority on this topic, it is her.

Please read all about her story and how the book came about.

And please, BE KIND, whether online or anywhere else. I know I’m probably preaching to the choir here, but just go with it.

Elaine